Tuesday, June 7, 2011

the best job in the world

My daughters. They are teenagers and we are in the thick of it! For as much as this is a blog primarily about food and the restaurant, it is also about my life journey and about the people in my life who teach me. Being a mother is the greatest joy in my life. It is way better than beef short ribs and peach pie! I have 18 years of delicious experiences of the becoming of a mother and the pitfalls, frustrations, and deep love of sharing that role with so many wonderful role models. It is not a job I take lightly, even though at times, I have been a distracted and a busy mother of two bright and lovely daughters.

This being a pivotal year for me; having just lost my own mother, and now, preparing for my eldest, soon to be 18, journeying forth on her own, to become an independent adult. It has been a time of uncomfortable change, for all of us. This transitioning of our souls has been a stretching of the boundaries and our love for each other. And it is time to let the girl fly on her own, but not without some trepedation. It has been challenging raising them in two households. Then add two new stepparents to their lives, add a pinch of resentment, a tablespoon of sorrow, and sometimes the end result is not often what you had hoped for!
I am trying to teach them about showing up to do the work, for being grateful, especially in a time in history when so many have so little, and respecting their elders, teachers, employers, friends, family . . .


The truth can sometimes be heartbreaking. Parental disappointment can either be humbling, or a reason to rebel and hold a position. Either way, change and growth is inevitable when we are all being asked, even demanded, to show up: for ourselves, each other, our community, our world. A hard thing to ask a 15 & 17 year old, but important and necessary.


I cannot predict their future, I can only hope that I have given them great values, common sense wisdom and instilled in them the importance of integrity. They will have their issues as adults. They will probably need some therapy when the sorrow of the divorce conflicts with the relationships they are in. I hope that they will do the work that will heal their spirits. It is a life long journey.